4 Tips On Dating
4 Tips On Dating
God cares about dating.
Why? Because God cares deeply about people. Dating is where two people who God cares about move into a relationship with one another. As well, dating is a move towards marriage. And God cares infinitely about marriage as it is his means of uniting two people who bring about family and thus contribute to the next generation of humanity. God cares about dating because God loves humanity.
This week, we discussed the point of dating at Rise Youth. It’s become about having sex, finding your soulmate, and being in love. But scripture has one purpose we pursue relationships. Dating is about marriages that glorify Jesus.
We looked at Isaac and Rebecca’s relationship and how important it was that they married in order to bring about not only the promise of God’s future family, but Jesus himself. Jesus was the descendant of Isaac. So Isaac’s relationship was a piece in the bigger story of God.
But so is yours.
In fact, it matters so much that you walk carefully toward your future marriage, because God fully intends to use the marriages of every believer to move the bigger story of redemption forward for all humanity. That’s what he did through Isaac’s marriage. That’s what I humbly pray he’s doing through mine. That’s what he’s going to do through your future marriage. I pray you feel the weight of that and get excited. Your marriage isn’t about you. It’s not about your future spouse. It’s about Jesus. Boom. I said it.
Since that is epic..since that matters so much…Here’s 4 tips on dating.
1. Don’t date until you're mature and ready. For many young people, dating is a dumb distraction (ouch). It can distract you from your own personal growth in faith. It can distract you from friendships and rich community. It can distract you from serving Jesus. It can distract you from church. It can distract you from fun. I personally would encourage students not to date until they are getting close to being ready to get married. Honestly, most of the time High School is NOT that time (also ouch). But that is up to you and your parents. The ultimate goal is marriage. Marriage takes a job, a car, a place to live, spiritual-emotional-monetary maturity. You don’t want to just date to date. You want to date to soon create a marriage that glorifies Jesus. Is that your season of life? Process slowly whether dating is wise at your age and spiritual season of life. The end goal matters too much to be flippant about this.
2. Seek first the Kingdom of God and all these things will be added to you (Matthew 6:33) When I met my wife, it was in a time of life that had really intended to be exclusively Jesus’ dude. I didn’t want to date anyone. I wanted to be exclusively Jesus’. But it was in that place of solely desiring him that I think it was most healthy for me to meet her. God brought my beautiful girl into my life when I found him to be the most beautiful thing in my life. God doesn’t want to be second. And your significant other can’t handle the weight of your soul. If God isn’t first in your life, they will be—and that will destroy them and your relationship.
3. Only pursue someone mature in their faith. Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another (Proverbs 27:17). These are top two things that define who you are: who you choose to spend your time with and what you read/consume/entertain yourself with. A significant other is a massive influence. So if you're a christian don’t date a non-christian . Just don’t. Missionary dating is a bad idea. 1 Corinthians 15:33 says, "Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.” The best decision I made in my life was pursuing Lindsey. Why? She has helped me draw closer to Jesus. You don’t just want to consider how cute a guy is but how much he will push you towards Jesus.
4. Don’t look for the ideal person become them. When we focus on who God is going to bring into our life it has two effects: 1. We shift the focus off of Jesus. 2. We put too much pressure on the future relationship. My encouragement would be to focus on Jesus and become the person you should be in Him. Like attracts like. If you want a spouse who worships Jesus with all they are, worship Jesus with all you are. Not with a motive to find them, but knowing that God is writing the story of your life, and you are faithfully following him as Lord.